I can do anything better than you…

 

From Mama Kat’s Writer’s Workshop…Write about something you are better at than your spouse.

Wow.  If ever there was a proverbial loaded gun in a writing prompt, this is it!

It all started with Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus.  Remember that book, written way back in 1992 by John Gray and how it focused on how each sex is acclimated to its own planet’s society and customs, but not to those of the other?

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I have a copy.  I refer to it, often.  Sometimes, I just want to throw the book at The Husband.

What…am I better at than my spouse?  Something?  Just one thing?  You must be kidding me!

For starters, I am…more organized than he.  The fact that, each and every time, when he cannot…find his glasses, his phone, the remote, his car keys, socks, underwear…I am in front of him approximately three seconds after his outburst, holding any, maybe all, of the above.

I put thoughts together more quickly than The Husband.  Any time he starts a conversation with “Remember that cranky guy who came into our business?”, I give him a name, date, description of what cranky guy wore on that day and what he purchased.

Here’s a BIG one…driving.   Car rides are always a test of patience.  And, from my “riding shotgun” side, a test of survival.  The Husband has a need to always adjust everything in the car… mirrors, volume, seat (okay, I’m short and he’s not so he has to move the seat back so his knees don’t hit the dashboard)…in any event, when he makes these adjustments, while driving, he tends to swerve.  I yell, he yells.  He drives faster than the speed limit because my car has front and rear laser radar detection.  He speeds, I yell.  He yells back.

And one more…cooking.  I am a pretty decent chef in my own right.  The Husband does not cook.  Ever.  Well, he did once, a long time ago.  He made an entire box of Uncle Ben’s rice.  A 2 lb. box.  20 servings.  He has since been banned from the kitchen.

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Last one.  Answering questions from our Grandkids.  When The Husband is comfortable with a given topic thrown out by one of the kids, there is no holding him back.  Or shutting him up.  Now and then, he’ll lapse into a blank stare, trying desperately to come up with an answer but I can see he’s like a drowning rat on a sinking ship.  He gives me a knowing, pleading, look and, of course,  Grandma always saves the day!

Yes, indeed.  Men and women are from different planets and can spend a lifetime together, never working out all which makes them unique in their relationship.  It can be difficult, consuming and downright exhausting.  But, as John Gray quoted…“Fortunately perfection is not a requirement for creating great relationships.”  

 

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Untold stories…

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Life should be about how we choose to react to what happens around us and what we’re able to make out of it.  We learn to almost reassemble our struggles into something positive.

Sometimes…we all need struggles in our lives, without any random obstacles, we might not be as strong as what we could have been.  Depending on how we choose to handle them, that will dictate just how hard our struggles are.  Either you meet these challenges head on or become a victim, choosing to lie down, play dead, and hope that if you ignore things long enough, all will simply disappear.

Choices.  We all have them and what is most important is how we face life, the steps we take in getting through struggles and make our lives better.  Even through those consuming hard times.

Battles.  Each one of us has our own; no one person has it any worse than another.  We each deal with things differently and what might be downright catastrophic to you might just be another day at the office for me.

As I put this post together, have to admit I impressed myself.  For a brief moment.  There’s a story here, untold, plain and simple, my personal struggle with much in my own life.   Sharing meaningful thoughts with others, attempting to impart some wisdom to someone else, can be so much easier than looking in the mirror at the reflection of what makes you…you.

I’m no different than anyone else who deals with things they cannot understand, or control.  Probably what haunts me the most are all the unanswered questions in my own life, unfulfilled dreams, damaged relationships and running out of time to make so many wrongs…right.

And maybe,  so many of these issues were always meant to be as I’m reminded of the Serenity Prayer…God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; the courage to change the things I can; and the wisdom to know the difference.

 

workshop-button-1From Mama Kat’s Writer’s Workshop…Write about something you struggle with.

 

 

 

 

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“Annie, get your gun!”

 

I am…a talker.

Carrying on conversations hasn’t always been part of my personality, in fact, anything but that.  It took years before the realization set in that I had something worthwhile to say, even more of an expanse of time where anyone listened.

That…has changed significantly as the years have passed.  Honestly, I don’t know if some of the knowledge stored on the hard drive of my brain just broke loose, made a run for it, or opportunities to randomly opine provided me with a long overdue talking platform.

Mind you, conversations held with select groups of friends, and family, can be easy.  Comfortable.  Take that to the next level where one speaks to a group of strangers, something else entirely.  Sweaty palms, squeaky voice, memory lapses and good old stage fright.  It happens.  Suddenly, you aren’t quite so witty anymore.  You tend to stumble over your words and hold onto prepared notes with a death grip.  No matter how much you rehearse at home, in front of a mirror, and sound like you’ve been doing presentations, or instruction for years, once you look out at a gathering of judgmental faces sitting before you, sheer panic sets in.

All of this came into play when I became a Firearms Instructor, several years ago.  Let’s face it, most of what’s involved with guns has predominantly been a man’s world.  Women have emerged into the sport of competitive shooting, but the instructional part has been dominated by men, at least in my neck of the woods.  Many women feel somewhat intimidated when they attend a firearms safety course where they may number 2 or 3 in a roomful of men.  I remember feeling the same back when I went for my instruction but, I held onto my rigid determination to pass the course with a perfect score.  Enter the keyword here…determination!  Women have it in just about everything they do.  That gave me the impetus to become an instructor and open a comfortable educational environment for women to learn gun safety.

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The day came for me to assist with teaching and dreaded stage fright stepped in at the start of the 8 hour course.  There I stood, way, way out of my personal comfort zone, preparing to teach several women who were feeling the same trepidation.   Most had never seen, or handled, a firearm up close while the men in the class sat there, smug in their handgun ability.  As I began speaking, I realized there was such an eagerness to learn on the part of the women students, my nervousness slowly disappeared.  I focused on how women excel at repetitive tasks and how safe gun handling is just that, a series of thoughts, movements and practices.  The ladies asked questions, they made endless notes and became so involved in all phases of the course.  Initially, they may have felt uncomfortable but that quickly passed as the instruction continued.  Here in New York, one must be licensed to use a handgun and in the courses I assist with, we do some outside range time utilizing pellet handguns for individuals not having a pistol license.  This gives students a great opportunity to go through the important steps of safe gun handling and do some target practice.  The women on the shooting range?  Outstanding!  And…determined!

And, please, nothing against any man reading this.  C’mon guys, let’s face it, the norm has always been, give a boy a stick and he’ll make an imaginary gun; give that same stick to a girl, she’ll use it to stir a pot of soup.  Well, let me tell you, get a woman out of her comfort zone, and into one of my courses, and she’ll surprise the hell outta you!

I even managed to surprise the hell outta me!

 

workshop-button-1From Mama Kat’s Writer’s Workshop…Share an experience that forced you to step outside of your comfort zone.

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